God has blessed me with five wonderful, healthy, smart and (mostly) adorable children.
You will notice that the list does NOT include quiet, meek, shy or calm.
My five children, combined with oh, just about anything, equals MASS DESTRUCTION.
To give you an idea, I’ve kept track of what has been broken around here in just the last two weeks.
- 1 Paper Jamz guitar (not expensive, but no longer made, listed on eBay for $70)
- The pump on an industrial sized bottle of shampoo (mine, of course) which causes shampoo to leak ALL over the place when used
- 1 blue drinking glass (my favorite)
- 1 tooth (Maria’s, which caused quite a panic and a call to the dentist, followed by Mommy-surgery)
- The sewer. FOUR times since the kids have been off from school. (Thank God for friends with the right equipment.)
- An iPhone-controlled RC helicopter. (Lasted less than 48 hours after Santa brought it.)
- My favorite coffee mug – no longer available in the company store from which it was bought.
- A hockey helmet. (Which I was able to fix, due to my quick reaction and ability to find all the parts that fell off.) Hmmm… starting to consider what might happen during a rough game.
- 16 (maybe 17) Christmas tree ornaments.
- 1 homemade archery foam target. (Think pink snow EVERYWHERE.)
- Several books.
- The toothpaste tube
- 1 (brand new) lamp
- 1 preschool Christmas project
- Two soccer photo magnets (3-year-old LOVES scissors.)
- Scads of crayons (which are then eaten by the dog.)
- A basket
- 1 hydrometer (used to make much-needed beer)
- Countless ping-pong balls
I’m absolutely sure I’ve left some things out, BUT thankfully, no human parts have been broken. Yet.
Think you have an indestructible toy? An unbreakable piece of furniture? A really tough home appliance?
Send it to me. I’ll prove you wrong.