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Which is more painful?
a) Wendi-the-Torturer’s spin class at the Y; or
b) attending mass with my three youngest children?

Let’s analyze this.

Spin class: 45 physically challenging minutes
Mass: One excruciating mentally and physically challenging hour

Spin class: Motivating, rockin’ music played loud enough to drown out any grunts of pain
Mass: Who can pay attention to the music? And, nothing’s loud enough to drown out the noise coming from our pew

Spin class: Darkened room so no one can see your pathetic attempt at exercise
Mass: Plenty of light so everyone can see your pathetic attempts at controlling your children

Spin class: Sweating profusely by the time it’s all over
Mass: Sweating profusely by the time it’s all over

Spin class: Feeling of accomplishment and improved physical health
Mass: No feeling. Just numbness. Mental and physical numbness.

I guess I shouldn’t feel like such a slacker for missing spin today due to attending mass. I got a workout in after all.

Seriously, though, the kids weren’t too bad (“They were just being kids!” My friend The Ironer Troy told me afterward.) And, that is true. Thankfully, we were surrounded by wonderful friends on all sides, shielding us from the evil eyes pointed in our direction.

Short vent: Really… why attend mass at a SCHOOL if you can’t stand the occasional disruptions children are known for?

This morning’s theme song: “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor