(More than) Fourinarow.net

This entry is dedicated to my good friend Kristina, who not too long ago elected herself Bad Mom of the Year. Now, anyone that knows Kristina knows that there is NO WAY she would EVER be elected Bad Mom of the Year, much less the minute.

She did, however, ONE TIME (unless there are others she has failed to mention) FORGET TO PICK UP HER OLDEST SON FROM SCHOOL. (The caps are for you, K.) Egads! Just think of the therapy the boy will have to endure to get over it.

Kristina, in actuality, did not forget to pick up her son, she just simply lost track of time. In her head it was an hour earlier than it really was. She realized her error mid-Starbucks and rushed off to get him. He She was seriously shaken up about it, but we all think he’s she’s going to be okay.

Well, Kristina, you’ll be relieved to know that it’s time to pass the torch.

Yesterday, after getting Maria from preschool, I came home, put The Little Boys down for a much needed nap and gave Maria her lunch. After she ate and was comfortably settled in front of the TV, I made myself some turkey chili for lunch (since it’s allowed on the South Beach Diet).

After making the chili, I grabbed myself a bowl and a book and sat down for a leisurely lunch. (Ha. What was I thinking?)

The phone rang.

The caller ID indicated that it was Jack’s school calling. “Uh-oh,” I thought. “Wonder what he did?”

“Mrs. H?”? Jack’s teacher asked.

“Yeeeeessss???” I said hesitantly.

“We had early dismissal today,” she said.

After a minute of silence while I was coming to the realization that he wasn’t in trouble, I responded with a very intelligent “Oh, no!!!”

“I was testing the parents. It’s the first time I haven’t sent a reminder all year,” she said jokingly (I think).

“Well I flunked,” I said. “I’ll be there in a minute.”

I had to wake up my soundly sleeping Little Boys (dammit), force Maria to disengage from the TV and load everyone into the van. Once behind the wheel, I felt TERRIBLE. I could just picture Jack standing there – the last child – waiting for me. I was sure I was the only idiot that had forgotten to pick up her child.

Well, I needn’t have worried. Not only was Jack one of several, but he was brought out by the art teacher/librarian, who he’s absolutely ga-ga about. I knew then that he hadn’t been concerned in the least about my late arrival. Heck, he probably hadn’t even noticed. Not with the lovely Mrs. D around.

So, Kristina – you’re hereby relieved of your title. I can’t promise that I’ll wear the hair shirt or go through with the floggings like you did, but I will accept the designation. Also, despite all my reassurances when it happened to you, I have to admit that I did feel a teensy bit bad when it happened to me.