(More than) Fourinarow.net

Yesterday was… chaotic. Okay, maybe chaotic isn’t quite the right word. How about psychotic inducing? Something along those lines.

The morning was good – I had the World’s Best Babysitter for three blissful hours. The middle of the day passed without incident (probably because The Little Boys were napping and Maria by herself – even if she’s at her worst, which she wasn’t – is easy.)

But after picking Jack up from school… SHEESH! I think ALL of the kids were celebrating Halloween a little early. They were monsters! Running, crashing, screeching, crying, pouncing (need I go on?) Surely they would have been hanging from the ceiling fan if they could have found a way to reach it. I was literally counting down the minutes until Dan arrived and we could leave for soccer practice.

Then…

The phone rings. Thirteen minutes before we’re set to leave. Guess who? Yep. And the news is not good. He has been rear-ended in his work car and he (along with the rear-ender) must remain at the scene until an official investigation can ensue.

#%&^!@!!

Did I mention that the plan was for me to drop the boys off at practice with Dan, run Maria to get her haircut close by, and then return in time for Maria’s practice (to be coached by the rear-endee)?

After clearing my mind of every foul word I could think of, I called the back-up coach, who was happy to take over the evening’s practice. Then I made a quick call to my awesome friend, The Ironer. As usual, she came through for me. She agreed to watch Luke while our older boys practiced and make sure Maria’s substitute coach got the equipment he needed for the practice in case I ran late getting back.

I took Sam with me to Maria’s appointment and all went smoothly. We returned just as Maria’s practice was getting underway.

I was starting to relax a little when my friend reported that all went well while I was gone… except.

“Ummmm here,” she said and handed me a ziploc bag containing Luke’s underwear. He still had his shorts on and they didn’t look wet, but I felt the need to ask the obvious.

“Did he pee?” (We don’t have the potty training quite down yet and we were in a place without a bathroom).

“No,” she said, quite calmly. “He pooped. By that tree over there.”

ACCCCCCCKKKKKKK!

Now, I have to admit that I’ve told him before that if he’s desperate he can find a tree. But I sure didn’t mean to POOP!

My poor, poor friend. Guess I better scratch her off the future favors list. (Not really. Despite what happened, I know she’ll willingly be there for me again in the future. She’s crazy daring that way.)

Dan showed up a little later to help finish Maria’s practice and the boys played fairly well during that time.

As I was herding monsters to the car (with juice pouches dropping, blanket dragging and soccer balls going astray) one of the moms from Maria’s team threw me a compliment. “I don’t know how you do it with four. You always do so well. You’re my hero!“

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

A whole day later and I’m still laughing.